Being forgiving is not a weakness. That's the first rule. It is a strength. By forgiving the people in your life, you allow yourself to move on with yours. It is quite easy to bear a grudge, no matter how deserved and hurt you feel. It doesn't really take much effort does it?
'Wait till I see them!'
'I'll make him, or her pay.'
Do to others as they do to you.'
And my favourite one of all time...'I'll never forgot, I'll tell you that much. I'll have my day.'
It all comes easy to say when you feel betrayed, because we safe guard ourselves so well. But remember, the more you harbour these negative feelings, the more they will eventually rob you of your self and your happiness. You only have to turn onto the morning chat shows to see family at each others throats, each blaming the other for their mess and an innocent child stuck right in the middle. If we behave responsibly and apologise then I believe forgiveness is the Nobel thing to grant.
Forgiveness also means forgiving yourself. There are times when we as people have made mistakes and unfortunately our uncontained energy has hurt others in the circle. Now, naturally we feel guilt and beat ourselves up. We turn in ourselves and self punish. This turns to self pity and can only rob you more. You have to use that strength that I know we all have inside, and move on. Lighten your load because your journey through life needs all your resources. Negative energy equals more negative energy. Positive energy equals positive energy.
You will of course encounter people who, beyond your board of control cannot compromise with. Just tell your self that they are not ready just yet, and channel your power else where. If you feel angry or sad, deep breathing form the stomach should help. We breath this way as babies and as we get older we breath from the chest.
Forgive, forget, let go, move on and free yourself from the prison that you have built.